The BIG Interview

So the big interview was this morning. Last night, the little boy started feeling HOT. Really hot... I took his temperature withe our eat thermometer that generally reads about 96 degrees for him and it was up to 100. something. I know that 100. something is not really even a fever, but given that it normally reads cooler, I figured something was up. This is also the first time that he's EVER had a fever or elevated temp of any sort. He seemed to be acting okay, but I gave him baby motrin just to be sure. I could tell just from having him on me that he cooled down, but he wasn't really into going to sleep... he was up until midnight. All I kept thinking was, "What would I do if I had to go to work all day tomorrow??" The surprising thing was, I had an answer. If I HAD to go to work, I would leave him here with a sitter. If I felt that he was too sick to be without me, I'd make arrangements to be home with him. The thought of having to manage a sick child would have normally had me freaking out, but last night, it seemed completely manageable. Interesting...

The little boy actually managed to sleep all night, though he did wake up with little cries a time or two, but quickly settled himself back down. When we woke up for the day about 6, he was HOT again, so he got more motrin as soon as he finished morning milk. He managed to eat a pretty decent breakfast and was in an okay mood. I, on the other hand, was tired and nervous about going. Since he hadn't gone to sleep the night before, I hadn't had any time to do the research that I wanted on the company or the industry. I hadn't tried on the suit and new shirt I bought- I didn't even know if the shirt would be short enough to fit under the suit jacket. I also hadn't switched from my MAMMOTH mommy purse to the more manageable one I wanted to take with me to the interview. I was definitely feeling a little stressed, but DH came to the rescue and took the baby at the appointed time so that I could go get ready. I put the suit and new shirt on- totally compatible! The only "problem" was that the suit was a little loose... hmmmm... not the best impression for the interview, but I wasn't about to complain that my clothes were fitting a little big! You don't really notice these things when you spend most days in sweat pants!

I walked out the door in my compatible suit and smallish purse feeling in control and looking, in my opinion, pretty decent for an overtired mommy. I figured I'd just put my best foot forward and see where that got me. Unfortunately, I made the mistake of checking myself out in the visor mirror in the car when I got to the interview site. No one should look at their dark undereye circles that closely! I assured myself that I would remain at least 3 feet from the interviewer at all times and we would be fine and headed in. I even managed to do a little more research about the company's product line before I was called in for the interview.

Here's where things get kind of cool... I won't bore you with ALL of the details of the interview- which actually lasted 2.5 hours- but one of the huge potential deal breakers with this job was an extended training session out of state. Extended as in leave your child and your husband and don't see them again for four weeks. I think that it would be a lot to ask either spouse to essentially be a single parent for four weeks and before the interview, I couldn't conceive of a way to make that work. BUT... here's the cool part, I think... the extended training? It actually takes place in New York... On Long Island... where my husband's family, who have been FROTHING at the mouth to squeeze my child happen to live. The huge deal breaker might have just become a perk...

The other thing that makes me think that this might just all work out? My husband's actually on board with the idea of me taking this job. There have been other opportunities that have come up in the past and he's been VERY against them. When we talked after this interview, he wasn't even on the fence, he just saw the same potential I did. He saw that this might be a good fit for our family and our situation right now. He saw that we might just be able to make this work. I cannot begin to tell you how blown away I am by this fact. Maybe I just don't generally give him enough credit, but really, his attitude towards this position amazed me. It is literally an answer to prayer.

So here I am, NOT conflicted. I'm very clear in how I feel- I want this job. I really want to believe that the fact that the training, which I thought would be a big issue, seems to be working itself out and that my husband is actually on the same page as I am means that this job is something that is supposed to happen. Honestly, though, I'm afraid of really getting my hopes up and being disappointed. I know that I could do the job, and excel at it, but given the current job market, I really think that they may have candidates with more experience in their specific field and I might get passed over. I'm hopeful though, and grateful for the opportunity to interview today. I feel oddly optimistic- like if this job doesn't come through, then maybe another will. In rereading my post from 3 months ago, I remember feeling like whatever happened was going to be the WRONG thing. I felt like if I got the job, it would be a terrible thing in that I had to leave my child, and if I didn't get the job, it would be a terrible thing for our finances. Now, though, even though I really want this job, I feel like even if I don't get it, we'll be okay and if I do get it, and have to leave my child, we'll still be okay and make that work too.

They will be holding two more rounds of interviews. Dates for the second round have not been set, but round three will be happening on August 28, so I'll either still be in the running then, or I'll know that this is not the job for me. I really, really, really, really hope that I'm still in the running...